A Fear Unfounded
by The Forgotten Silent Maiden
Summary: Maybe he could skip going home, and just go straight to Professor Oak's ranch and see his pokemon. Play and train to the late hours of night before going home and avoiding his mother. He could delay the inevitable. Rated T just in case. Mentions Dysphoria and actual fears.
1. Unfounded

**A Fear Unfounded**

**Disclaimer****: Do not own.**

Coming home after he received his sixth badge was refreshing. Being able to come to his home town and relax with his pokemon before training for the upcoming indigo league.

At least, Ash hoped that would happen.

He traveled slowly, lingering slightly behind an excited Misty and a half listening Brock, clutching Pikachu tight in his arms as he passed familiar foliage. He ignored the small jabs Misty sent at him for their first meeting, as he thought of his upcoming conversations.

Maybe he could skip going home, and just go straight to Professor Oak's ranch and see his pokemon. Play and train to the late hours of night before going home and avoiding his mother.

He could delay the inevitable.

Ash winced at the thought, tightening his grip on Pikachu who mewled slightly.

Avoiding the conversation would only drop added anxiety in his chest. Forcing him to avoid his mother until he went to the indigo league.

And if things went south…

Well, Brock did always say his home was welcome to Ash and Pikachu.

Sun rays brushed down the thinning tree leaves from above, warming his anxiety driven body and sending a shiver down his spine.

"Is that pallet town?" Misty squealed, stars alight in her eyes as she gazed upon the small village.

Ash peeked up, letting a shadow fall over his eyes as he gazed fondly at his hometown.

It could be the last time he ever saw it again…

"Yeah, my house is right there." Ash pointed to a red roofed house, just down the hill from Professor Oak's Ranch. "I'm going to talk with my mom, you guys can look around for a bit if you want."

Brock nodded in understanding as Misty huffed.

"Why don't we all go then?" Misty asked raising a ginger eyebrow. "I want to meet your mom!"

Ash winced but shook his head.

"Yeah but i gotta talk to my mom about important stuff. It shouldn't take longer than an hour at most." Ash shrugged helplessly. "I thought you guys would want to go to the Professor's ranch first anyway."

And Misty had stars in her eyes again before she nodded in agreement. She dragged Brock along, who looked back at him and gave him a strong smile.

Ash weakly smiled in return, sucking in a large breathe as he trudged slowly to his house.

Pikachu chittered in comfort, patting his arm and distracting him from his darker thoughts. It didn't work as well as either thought, but Ash was grateful for any tiny distraction his mind would get.

All too soon he stood in front of his house's door, the wooden slab seeming far more foreboding than any door should really be.

Heaving in a sharp breath, he knocked and pushed the door open.

"Mom, I'm home!" he called out.

He heard a gasp from upstairs and the gentle thudding of his mom running down.

He let Pikachu fall from his arms and scramble onto his shoulder as his mother embraced him into a hug.

His eyes watered, but he buried his face into her stomach and clung to her tightly as she spouted words of love and thankfulness.

Ash couldn't help but think this may be the last time he could ever hug her like this.

"Oh you've grown so much!" She grinned, pushing back slightly to see him. "And you Pikachu! You look healthier than I last saw you! It's great you two are taking care of each other."

His mom glanced around, quickly noting the absence of his friends.

"Ash, sweetie, where are your friends?"

He swallowed but looked up, smiling.

"They went to go see the professor's ranch! I told them I wanted to see you first so i came here instead!" The stone in his stomach dropped.

"Oh I see, I'll make you two something to eat then!" She smiled at him again, letting go of his hug and turning to the kitchen. "We could make Katsudon! Or Ramen if you'd like, oh i wished you called beforehand so I would have prepared something for lunch!"

"Yeah.. Sorry i was just so-" nervous, scared, fearful- "excited to come home!"

She laughed lightly, waving away his excuse.

"Oh honey don't worry, it'll take a bit longer to make something but it's alright." She waved him closer. "Come on, me and you can cook again like we did when you were younger."

"Actually mom," he cut her off quickly, his body shaking slightly. "I...I need to talk to you...Seriously."

Her smile fell, eyebrows knitting together in worry as she finally saw how scared he looked.

"Ash...Is everything alright?"

He twiddled his fingers together, rocking slightly on the balls of his feet. He felt like he had been caught in a lie.

"Everything's…" could he lie to her? Again. "Not okay, but it will be in time… is why i gotta talk to you."

He motioned to the couch and dragged his body there slowly. Sitting on their large couch, as he watched his mother inch her way towards her recliner slowly. Unconsciously, sitting across from him.

"Ash…" he peaked up slightly. "What's wrong with Pikachu's tail?"

His body froze as his eyes darted towards Pikachu, who was now angling their tail away from his mother's eyesight.

Their tail was no longer the flat edge it had once been, their tail rounding out and curving in a half circle. It didn't have the normally straight edge, but it also wasn't as curved as a female Pikachu's heart shaped tail.

"That's…" No- no more dancing around the subject. "That's part of what I wanted to talk to you about."

She nodded and sat down, leaning forward to look at him. Ash himself shifted, sitting back and snuggling closer into the couch before leaning forward.

"I...I need to tell you that i haven't been...Entirely honest with you on our calls." he admitted softly. "I wasn't… I wasn't as okay as i wanted you to believe...And it took me awhile to admit that myself. Really, I -uh- I actually just recently realized I wasn't okay."

He looked up at her, slapping his knees as he leaned back.

He couldn't look at her anymore.

"Around going to Cerulean i started noticing something weird with me." Again, Ash paused to take a sharp breathe. "I dunno, id look at other people ...and i would feel jealous, id look at girls and guys and just get mad, and i didn't know why so i avoided them."

He remembered it too well, both misty and her sister invoked a wrath he couldn't understand. And that wasn't even from interacting with them. Just staring at them would make him feel angry and numb, like his whole life was falling apart without him knowing what was happening.

"I would always wake up and feel...weird. Some Days, I just hated waking up, I hated looking at myself in the mirror and I hated the way i sounded and acted and...And everything about me felt wrong."

He didn't look up as he screwed his eyes shut. He couldn't look at her, not yet...not yet.

"It didn't make sense to me, cause other days and i didn't care about my body or my voice or how i was. I loved being me and everything about me. And sometimes id even be proud of the body i had, i was proud I was me and it was driving me insane. I didn't understand."

He paused in his rant to look outside the window.

"Those days I didn't hate other girls and boys, on those days all I cared about was Pokemon and my love for battling. It was like those other days didn't matter. But I always go back to those days. Where no matter how hard I tried, every time i saw myself id hate my body more and more." he absently scratched at Pikachu's head. "I think it was on my way to Fuchsia that i ran into a trainer who told me what I was feeling.

_"You're dysphoric," The female trainer shrugged. "It's something that happens to some people. Don't be ashamed of it." _

_Ash stared at the girl wide eyed, unable to comprehend that she had heard his whispers. _

"_You'll get used to it." She patted his arm, almost mockingly at this point. "Good luck with that."_

_She had never explained and walked off to retrieve her pokemon. _

_It wasn't until later at night that he asked Brock about it. _

_"A state of unease or a general dissatisfaction of life." Brock read aloud from the computer they were standing by. "I dunno Ash, is this really what you're feeling?" _

_Ash shook his head. _

_"Not all the time, and it only happens when i hate my body ya know? It's always my body but it's not all the time."_

_Brock hummed thoughtfully, clicking away at the computer before clicking on the search. _

_"Body Dysphoria." He read. "People with this disorder may frequently examine their appearance in a mirror, constantly compare their appearance with that of others, and avoid social situations or photos."_

_"That sounds like the days i don't want to be in my body." Ash admitted. "But it's not like...All the time but i can never tell when it happens."_

_"Well it sounds like what you're looking for." Brock hummed. "Maybe if we knew more about what was happening we could find out more?"_

_"So what?"_

_"We should probably visit a doctor and check it out." Brock nodded. "I'm sure they know more than we do." _

_"Like a Nurse Joy?" _

_"More like a doctor joy, Ash."_

"I think it was just a bit before Blaine that i had a doctor's appointment about it." Ash shrugged, uncomfortably. "We mentioned that i could have a type of Dysphoria and the doctor said once we came back we could walk in and figure it out with a professional viewpoint. Me and Brock jumped at the chance but we avoided telling Misty the real reason, instead telling her i had a physical i needed to go to. She believed us and on the way we got caught by a storm."

His mom didn't move other than a slight tensing of her muscles.

"I don't really remember what happened, i think i slipped down a cliff away from Brock and Misty before i had to take cover. I didn't have my phone at the time so I just had to hope the rain let up soon. But I was feeling so bad that day already, and i know its bad but i depended on Brock and Misty to take my attention away from my own insecurities. I was alone with only the sound of rain and Pikachu's voice to distract me but it wasn't enough."

He scratched the back of his neck.

"I can't understand Pikachu too well yet. I get little word here and there, and both of us are learning sign language but we aren't good yet. And not hearing proper words just sent me in a spiral and i couldn't help myself."

_Ash was scratching at his arms, letting his small nails leave angry red scratch marks across his paling tan skin. Pikachu tried their best, blocking his attempts with a slap of their tail but even that wasn't enough._

_Soon he grabbed fistfuls of his hair and yanked, unable to hear Pikachu's cries of desperation as they desperately yanked his arms away from his hair. Small yellow claws dragging a thin arm with all their might._

_"Pikapi! Pikapi Pi!" Pikachu screeched, a small fist thumping against Ash's arm_.

"Me and Pikachu didn't even notice when other people joined us. I was so lost in thought and Pikachu was trying to stop me that we didn't notice it till it was too late."

_"Well, well, well if it ain't da twoips without da other twoip and twoipette" A scratchy accent broke through, sneering at the sight. _

_"And it looks like their lost and all alone." A women hummed, chortling in delight._

_"I say we do what we can, nab the Pikachu and run!" a final male voice rang out _

_"Sounds like a plan!" the other two chorused._

"Their names were Jessie, James and Meowth. They are a part of Team Rocket to steal Pokemon." His mother growled and he refused to flinch, tensing immediately. "They aren't all that bad, but they don't know how to get their head on straight. But...They helped me and Pikachu a lot that day."

_"Pikapi!" Pikachu please once more, looking around in worry. _

_Instead they found the trio sneaking up behind them, making the three thieves freeze in horror as they stared down the little electric mouse. _

_Pikachu jumped towards them and they scrambled back, holding their arms out in preparation of a thunder shock. Instead, Pikachu began to scream rapidly. Looking back at Ash every few seconds. The mouse looked desperate, wet tear tracks falling down their face before they gasped and rushed back to Ash, pulling his arm away once more. _

_"Pikapi! Pikachu Pikapi! Pika chu pi pika!" They sobbed, clutching Ash's arm tightly. _

_"Uh…" Jessie blinked rapidly. "Meowth translation please?"_

_Meowth's ear twitched as he looked back at his partners._

_"Pikachu is saying dat da twoip is hurting himself, without the rock twoip around dere's nothing to distract him. Pikachu is doing all dat it can, but it needs help. And he wants us to help him."_

_Both Jessie and James squirmed, looking at each other. _

_"We could just turn and walk away…" James grinned weakly._

_"Pretend we never saw this right!" Jessie added, smiling a bit too brightly. _

_"Ye, we're da bad guys!" Meowth agreed easily. "We don't do no helping!"_

_The three of them nodded and turned away, ready to march back to their hideaway. But another broken sob of Pikachu and Ash made them turn back uneasily. A gross feeling squirming in their stomach as they looked upon their young forms. _

_"No one's around-" Jessie started uneasily._

_"He's all alone." Meowth added. _

_"No one will see us." James finished shaking his head._

_The three straightened out, before marching over. _

_Jessie quickly snatched the ten year old off the ground, not minding his damp clothes as she help him tightly. _

_Ash quickly wrapped his arms around her neck as his legs snaked around her waist. Sobbing freely into her neck as his body shook from his sobs. She swallowed back her grimace, letting James drape an abnormally large rain coat over him as he carried Pikachu._

_The trio ran into a small hideout nearby keeping sure that they avoided the heavier amount of rainfall and stayed ducking beneath trees. _

_Finally making it inside, James quickly ordered Jessie to help Ash take off his jacket and shirt, wrapping him in a towel before asking the boy to take off his wet clothes as he provided the boy some over sized clothes. _

_Meowth silently grabbed the wet clothes and threw them in a washer, handing the mouse a towel and helping him dry off._

_Ash's sobs dwindled, laying off towards particularly small sniffles as he carefully threw on the dry sweatpants and shirt._

"For the longest time we stayed quiet. I think if Pikachu hadn't asked me if I was okay."

"Did he help you out there?"

"They helped start the whole conversation honestly."

_"Pikapi, pikachu?" Pikachu asked him quietly. _

_Ash stared blankly at Pikachu, tilting his head. Meowth, quickly noticing the stare, spoke up._

_"He's asking if you're okay." Meowth translated, quickly looking away._

_Ash nodded in understanding, smiling weakly At his best friend._

_"I'm fine Pikachu, it's just another day today." he quickly petted Pikachu's drying fur. "I'll be fine."_

_"Pika pika chu pikapi!" _

_"He says 'It always comes back though'." _

_"Then I'll handle it again." Ash shrugged. "It hasn't stopped us before, it's not gonna stop us now."_

_"Kachu, pikapi, pikachu pika." he grabbed Ash's arm, staring at the flaming red marks. "Ka, pika pi pikachu._

_"'We can't be sure that you won't hurt yourself again'." Meowth squirmed uncomfortably. "Twoip, why did you hurt yourself today?"_

_Ash's head snapped up as he glared, a snarl forming on his lips. _

_"It's none of your business!" he growled out, teeth gnashing at the sudden intrusion. _

_Meowth's fur spiked up as he tensed, ready for a fight. A low hiss echoed his own throat at the confrontation. _

_"Pika!" Pikachu snapped at Ash, calming his trainer almost instantly. "Pikachu pika, pikapi pikachu pika pika pi!"_

_"He says that it doesn't matter now, that because you hate your body you're hurting yourself and that's not okay." Meowth's body didn't unwind, still tense, but his words leaked a small calmness._

_There was a beat of silence as Meowth finally calmed down._

"_You...Hate your body?" Jessie asked softly, as if she knew. _

_Ash silently wondered if she did._

"_Yes but no." He answered after another small silence. "There are days I love or i don't care about my body, but there are days like today-" _

_"Where for no reason you hate how you look, sound and act...Am I right?" James quickly finished for him. _

_Ash blinked but nodded anyways, slowly at first. _

_"I look at other trainers and i can't help but feel jealous of em." he looked down, suddenly ashamed. "I get so mad and jealous of Misty and the other trainers that I can't help it. But its only on days like this..."_

_James nodded quietly. And looked back at the room, with a calculating look on his face._

_"Twerp." He paused as if reconsidering his words. "Ash-" he conceded. " I need you to go into the bathroom, Jessie help me pick out an outfit." _

_Ash in his state of confusion let Meowth lead them to the only bathroom, waiting for a minute or two before the bathroom door opened and a bundle of neatly folded clothes was laid on the counter. _

_"Put them on." James called from behind the door. "And once you're done come back outside."_

_Despite his better instincts begging him to run, Ash crawled forward to look at the clothes. Easily locking the bathroom door as Pikachu hopped on the counter. _

_The two of them honestly expected to see Rocket clothing, instead they stared at a black blouse and a pair of skinny jeans and shorts?_

_Shrugging he awkwardly pulled on the clothes, before looking around for a mirror. _

_He was never so grateful to not see one. _

_"I'm done." Ash called out, opening the door and peaking outside. _

_The trio sat there, with a chair directly in front of a waiting chair. Jessie perked up, rushing over to grab Ash's hand and dragging him into the seat. _

_"If I'm pulling your hair just tell me okay? Sometimes there are tangles and that's gonna hurt but i can use this- "She sprayed a small liquid into the air. "To make it easier to detangle alright?"_

_Ash mutely nodded as Pikachu watched from his lap. _

_With a gentle hand, she began to carefully comb through this hair, pausing every time he winced to spray the liquid into his hair._

_Once she declared she was done, she pushed a headband onto his head and placed something beside his ear. It was too light for him to bother so he let it be. _

_Jessie swung out in front of him, clicking something with her fingers. _

_"This one, won't hurt either. Just close your eyes and don't squeeze okay?" _

_Once he nodded, she ordered him to close his eyes. It was an odd sensation, to feel the cool metal against his eyelashes but overall he didn't mind. It didn't hurt anyway._

_"And done!" it was over surprisingly fast. _

_She stepped back, letting James step forward. He gave him a light blue sweater and a green handbag. He had seen plenty of trainers carrying them so he was slightly confused. _

_"Now prepare yourself." Meowth announced, standing next to a covered object. _

_He pulled the sheets dramatically, but once Ash saw the barest hints of a reflection, he flinched and turned away, almost unable to stare at the horror he'd see. _

_He felt a weight on the bag resting on his shoulder, peeking down to see Pikachu sitting on the side bag easily. His own hat resting on his pals head._

_"Pikapi." Pikachu smiled and turned to the mirror, trilling happily at the sight._

_Breathing heavily, he tried his best to peak._

"_You can do this Ash." Meowth cheered. "Come on just a peek!"_

_Finally steeling himself, he turned towards the mirror with closed eyes before snapping them open. Awaiting the mess, the cowardice that was- _

_Himself._

_His eyes widened as he stared upon the mirror. A very pretty girl standing in his view instead._

_She was slightly hunched over, as if curling on herself. Edging closer to the mirror._

_Her blouse was large but small enough to fit her easily. The shorts she had worn were resting just above her knees. The jacket hung slightly on her elbows, not covering her shoulders. A white headband rested on her head, pushing all her hair back but a cowlick that angrily stuck out, a pretty red and blue rose sticking out from her right ear._

_Her eyelashes were curled, bringing attention away from her scarred cheeks._

_She was beautiful._

_The heavy feeling that settled into his chest lightened considerably. A smile graced her features as tears burned in his eyes. _

_That was him._

_He was her…_

_"Is this a trick?" She asked softly._

_Instead James shook his head._

_"That's you." He answered. _

_"How?"_

_"You were feeling Dysphoria." James smiled, sadly if anything. "Body and gender dysphoria. I can't say for certain which it was -I'm no doctor- but i knew it was one. I decided to give you a way to figure out. I think you had gender dysphoria. So I wanted to see how you would like it like this."_

_She twirled easily, never taking her eyes off the mirror. _

_"I feel...Lighter." Ash answered truthfully. "I don't feel bad -dysphoric- every time but… this helps."_

_James smiled again, this time a bit brighter._

_"He guessed that you were probably trans or Genderfluid." Jessie pitched in helpfully. "I'm voting for Genderfluid myself."_

_"What's genderfluid?"_

_Meowth grinned, standing beside his two friends. _

_"Twoipette." Ash felt a bubble of warmth worm its way into her heart. "We have a lot to teach ya!"_

"And they did." Ash smiled at the memory, despite everything. "Pikachu decided then and there that they were nonbinary, they don't like being referred to as a boy or a girl or it. They like to be called they, we found overtime that their tail began to change but Brock and the Nurses said they were fine."

He took in a Large breath and looked down.

"I...I'm Genderfluid...I don't always want to be a boy or a girl, but I don't always want to be a them either. I want to change and i feel like a boy a girl or a they sometimes." he felt his body sink lower. "I hope you understand mom."

There was silence, and Ash blinked back the tears threatening to fall.

"So…" she started out slowly. "What's today supposed to be?"

Ash swallowed again.

"I….I feel like a girl today." She answered softly. "I don't mind being called Ash...It's like a nickname, but i also liked being called Ashley."

Another small beat of silence.

"I can't have this, i won't accept it." Ash's mother whispered harshly.

And Ash broke, she felt the tears begin to fall. Her body ready to break from the sobs building up in her throat.

Instead, she felt gentle hands lift her up into another bone crushing hug before she faced her mother's kind eyes.

"We should get you more feminine clothes that fit. I know Kanto isn't the most accepting place but I want my daughter to have some kind of bow or skirt." and she excitedly clapped her hands. "I can start teaching you how to braid and how to do your makeup if you'd like! Oh but first we have to make some lunch for you and your friends!"

Ash's lipped quivered in disbelief, a broken sob clawing her way to her throat as she hugged her mother. Clinging on to her as if she'd leave.

"Oh honey." Her mother cooed, holding on just as tight. "I understand you were afraid, and I'm sorry for ever scaring you. But you are my child, my baby boy and my baby girl. Nothing about you will ever, and I mean _ever _make me turn away from you."

She hummed softly, letting her daughter just cling and cry, even as her Pokemon hugged them both and began to sob tears of relief as well.

"I don't know if you'd like this, but before you were born I wanted to name you Miho if you were a girl. If you want i can use that name on days like today."

Ash didn't know why she worried so much. She knew her mother wasn't a horrible traditional kantonese mother.

But sometimes she couldn't help but worry.

She's glad she was wrong.

**Hello Everyone! Maiden here and i'm sort of kind of not really back? **

**This was something that has been building up for months now, and i really do adore writing. it's just a matter of the fact that i never have any time to do so anymore. or that i don't have the motivation to do so. **

**sorry.**

**But anyways i hope you enjoy this.**

**-Maiden Out. **


	2. Reinforced

**A Fear Reinforced**

**Warnings :Mentions of Homophobia**

**Disclaimer****: Do not own.**

It wasn't more than a week away. And if Ash was going to be honest, he was more scared of the fact that he still hadn't decided what to do.

The parade was technically in the middle of the Indigo League, but the Indigo League was going to be put on hold for the parade.

The very first LGBTQ+ parade Kanto had ever seen.

It was a huge step in the right direction for the biased Region. Professor Oak and several Gym Leaders standing for it, supporting it upfront or from behind the curtains. Promoting it and shaming the ones who were against such a wonderful idea.

That wasn't stopping the homophobic people though.

Ash had to admit, he wasn't a real victim of homophobic abuse. His mother loved him, he had a few friends supporting him, and the people he had met were just as welcoming to the community, even if he never said a word about himself.

That didn't stop it from happening to other people.

Already, people were rallying up to be at the parade to be general nuisances or to cause a riot. Some officers had outright refused to help something so.. Disgusting.

It was disheartening, knowing that everyone going were going to prove they were just as human as the rest. But people kept calling them things, they called him and Pikachu a thing because of who they were.

Ash wanted to prove them wrong like everyone else. Wanted to show everyone he was just as human as everyone else, prove to them that he deserved to be treated as such.

But as he laid on the bed, stomach squirming from wild thoughts as Pikachu lay beside him, with the same wild look in their eyes as they debated if they really should go.

They shouldn't have to prove anything. It was common sense.

But people were mean, and cruel and flat out disgusting.

Ash shouldn't have to fear them to go to a parade that would make him feel welcomed. Where he would find other's just like him, like Pikachu and Jessie and James. To find people who would understand how he felt, who could look him in the eye and tell him, one day it would all be okay. He didn't have to be afraid.

But he was.

He feared there were people that were going to try to hurt him one way or another. To hurt pikachu, or the other people who were going to be around him.

He was afraid he'd be made into an example.

Shaking his head from dark thoughts, he held Pikachu tighter and closed his eyes.

Maybe he'll join next year…

Early next morning he babbled about the league, excited it was finally underway. Ignoring the dark thoughts curling in his head, the pushing anxiety setting his shoulders in a tight crunch.

He was a trainer, one who had finished the gym challenge in order to battle the best of the current trainer generation. He was allowed to be excited for this.

"Do you think I can win it all?" He asked Brock, jumping up as Pikachu pounced around happily.

"You've got a shot like everyone else." Brock grinned. "Keep your head in the game and don't lose focus and I'm sure you'll make it far."

"But not win?" Ash pouted dramatically, crossing his arms and glaring at Brock mockingly.

"I didn't say that, it's a possibility but i don't want to get your hopes too high." he ruffled his cap, knocking it back a bit.

"So in essence you suck." Misty teased lightly, getting a frown in return. "But I'm sure you'll do fine, just remember everyone was strong enough to beat the gym challenge."

Ash's smile returned full force, grinning as he nodded in confirmation.

"I think I'm going to use Krabby for the first match. I know i haven't trained him as much but I want him to have a fight as well." Ash waved his arm around, pinching his hands like a Krabby's claws. "He's pretty strong as is so-"

He jumped, being cut off by a violently loud crash followed by equally loud cursing.

The trio of trainers bolted over, happening upon an odd scene. A torch lay on the floor with a flame burning bright, a large hole was filled halfway with a large vehicle as an officer Jenny desperately tried to push it up with all her might. An old man clung desperately to the top, legs kicking almost Comically as he struggled not to fall in the hole while a trainer lay in the hole yelling profanities.

Not bothering with anything or asking any question, Ash ran forward, intent on helping the Jenny as Brock called out his Geodude.

"Pull the car back, try not to dent the metal okay?" Brock ordered.

With a small confirmation, Geodude reached under the car and started to pull back, pausing at every crease of metal and switching her hold until the car was at least stable.

As Brock called Onix out to help move the car further back, Ash and Misty rushed over to help the other trainer out reaching out their arms to grasp the trainers form.

He was cursing the entire time, holding his quickly swelling ankle, before grabbing on to let the duo pull him out.

"Goddamn it!" The trainer cursed, before looking up guiltily to the old man who was struggling to get down from the car.

"I'm sorry Mr. Goodshow-" He let out a quiet hiss when the Officer Jenny inspected his leg, prodding it with a gentle finger. "I don't think I can run any further."

"Its fine, please Officer Jenny take him to the hospital." the old man -Mr. Goodshow apparently- sighed. "Ill contact another trainer and see if I can get someone to run the torch."

Time slowed to a stop and Ash called out before he could stop himself.

"I'm a trainer-" all eyes turned to him. "I'd be willing to carry the torch the rest of the way."

The other trainer sneered, causing Ash to twitch uncomfortably.

"Being a trainer isn't all you need kid." officer Jenny helped the kid up, supporting his weight none too gently judging by his wince. "You need to have qualified for the league, which means-"

"Completing the 8 gym badge challenge." Ash cut off abruptly. "I know because I did it."

He showcased his badge case, glaring at the older teen who gaped at him.

"I maybe a newbie but i did the original 8 challenge." He silently put them away as the teen continued to gape, turning over to Mr. Goodshow. "Sir, i know I'm really young but I would really like to help out."

The old man gave him a raised brow, forcing Butterfree's to flail in his stomach as he struggled not to squirm uncomfortably. Not that he was succeeding, judging by Misty's hand laying on his shoulder.

Then the old man smiled, grinning at him.

"Of course Kiddo, thanks for helping out." He motioned over to the torch laying on the floor, nodding to the Jenny before climbing back into the car once it was safely on the other side of the hole.

Ash quickly stepped aside to let the car roll by, scrambling to get his jacket off. Pikachu rolled off his shoulders, and picked up the torch, swinging it wearily before they offered the torch to him.

Giving the electric type a happy smile, he plucked the torch from his best friends grasp.

"We'll see you at the tournament." Brock called out, waving his arms.

Ash waved back, shouting a quick farewell before focusing on the flame before him. He curved a hand in front of it in a futile attempt to block the wind, noticing the flame flicker for a fraction of a second.

"It's really warm." He murmured, walking over to the side of the car.

"That my boy," He started, swiveling his head to face Mr. Goodshow. "Is Moltres' very flame, one that has yet to die from hundreds and thousands of years. Its is the flame of our very own legendary bird that will bless this tournament and the very first pride parade."

Ash eyes widened as he gazed at the flame, unnoticing of the president's searching glare.

"Why would we need the flame for the parade?" Ash asked, turning slightly to acknowledge the Jenny jogging up to them.

"The flame is to represent Moltres' approval. Every year our very own league torch brightens, i have no doubt that our LGBTQ+ community deserve and will have Moltres' approval for our very first parade." His voice suddenly grew hard and disappointing as he raised a brow to the child. "Is there a problem with that?"

"Not at all sir!" Ash squeaked out, staring at the flame before he began to jog.

He stared at the flame in awe, grinning at Pikachu who purred in question.

"This will be going to the League and the Pride parade, Pikachu, remember? The parade I told you about." Pikachu squeaked in confirmation, jumping off his shoulder to run alongside him.

"You told your Pikachu about the parade?" Jenny called out, raising a brow that Ash couldn't see.

His breathing hitched, whether it be from running or the question, he didn't know.

Uneasily, he nodded.

"Hai, I told all my Pokemon about the parade," He passed the torch to his other arm but kept up his run. "I was debating on taking them there to support our friends but…"

He cut himself off in a stammer, swallowing roughly.

Should he be saying this?

"But?" He glanced back just in time to catch a surprisingly please look from the President.

"But…" He trailed on rubbing the back of his head. "I'm scared of being hurt ya know? Everyone I have ever met throughout my journey has been nothing but kind to the community, whether I bring it up or not, but that's just cause I've been very fortunate and lucky. But people… there are people out there who don't think we're human, that we're weird or mentally ill to be who we are."

He stared at the ground, Pikachu's yellow fur drawing his attention. The mouse smiled uneasily, trotting towards his leg to rub his cheek onto the fabric of his pants.

"Pikapi…" Ash sucked in a large breathe, then very slowly released it.

"They won't hesitate to hurt us, and i know it's the first parade but I'm scared of the backlash, i don't want to be hurt but i know that if someone gets hurt, I'm going to try to help them." He let out a sigh. "Maybe, if all goes well, I'll join next year."

"That sounds like a plan." Goodshow conceded, looking back towards the road, but a thoughtful frown adorned his face.

The long trek to the Pokemon league was passed by quickly through casual conversation. The trio of humans seemingly unwilling to bring back the original subject.

When Ash made it too the stadium, he was panting in exhaustion. Gross hot sweat making his shirt cling to his body before he handed the torch to the next bearer.

The lack of warmth was instant. The soft warm comfort of the open flame was quickly replaced by the cool spring breeze.

Ash shivered, walking away before he entered the poke center.

Again, he wondered if it'd be worth going to the parade.

About a week in, the pride parade came round. Many trainers joining in with ribbons and bands of rainbow, many flags Ash could never hope to recognize rose as well.

There were...So many people.

They crowded around a specific area, right in front of the league doors, as they waited for the parade to officially start.

But…

There was no flame bearer.

"Flame?" Brock raised and eyebrow.

He hummed in response, squinting his eyes to look for the bright echo of Moltres' flame.

"Mr. Goodshow wanted to open the parade with the flame, to show that Moltres would support us as well." Ash turned to grin. "Cool, right?"

The rock trainer ruffled his hair, knocking his cap back.

"Very cool.".

They waited for another five minutes, frowning slightly when people began to look nervous. It didn't help that there was a crowd of people starting to form before them screaming something Ash couldn't hear.

There was a knock on their door, Pikachu racing over and unlocking it with a flick of their tail.

A Jenny stood there, glancing at them.

"MY DEAR JENNY, HOW RADIANT YOUR BEAUTY IS, ALMOST AS RADIANT AS THE RAINBOWS THAT FLY OUTSIDE." Brock squealed, running over and falling to his knee as he held the Jenny's hand.

Jenny stepped back, her arm snapping towards her with a wide eyed look, before she shook her head and glancing at Ash.

"Ash Ketchum?" he nodded, allowing her to straighten out with a smile. "President Goodshow has requested your presence "

There was a deathly pause as Brock shot out of his lovesick phase in surprise. The duo glanced at each other, Ash giving a silent shrug before hesitantly following the officer.

Without question, Brock and Pikachu fell in line. They didn't travel for long, stepping down at the very center of the pokecenter which was suspiciously empty. A Nurse Joy stood behind the counter, lightly doodling and grinning, looking up for a second to wave before looking back down.

Mr. Goodshow stood by the doors, staring at the parade with a suspicious glow highlighting the floor and window.

"Mr. Goodshow," The Jenny bowed, causing the older man to turn to them. "I've brought the trainer you requested."

He smiled, nodding at the Jenny who proceed her way towards the front counter. She started to talk quietly to the Nurse joy, grasping the other's hand.

"Ash," Mr. Goodshow grinned, gaining Ash's attention as he beckoned the trio forward. "I have a proposition for you, my boy."

"Me?" He walked closer, finally seeing Mr. Goodshow hold up the torch in his grasp, "What do you need me for."

"For a bit of context-" He held out the torch, prompting Ash to grasp the handle. "I would like you to carry the torch for Kanto's first pride parade."

A gasp escaped Brock's lips as Ash nearly dropped the torch in shock. His face went white as a hot prickly sensation crawled up his neck and began to swing around his chest.

"W-wha-" He began, only to have the president steamroll over him.

"Our original torch runner, the boy who had carried the torch before you turned out to be very homophobic. He had planned to turn Moltres' flame against the very people Moltres was going to bless." His eyes turned dark, before a soft smile touched his lips. "The flames burned him instead and we needed another Torch runner. Would you do us the honor?"

Ash floundered, arms shaking.

Could he do this? Lead a group of people to the bright future Kanto really needed? He had been so hesitant before and he was sure he couldn't do it.

But…

Why did he have to hide something that made him who he was? Why did he have to hide at all?

With an odd resolve he never felt before he nodded.

"Give me a few minutes to change and ill be right down."

Mr. Goodshow's eyebrows rose in surprise, an uneasy nod followed shortly.

Ash quickly passed the torch to Brock and ran upstairs, going by two before bursting into his room.

Throwing off his clothes, he quickly threw his hat onto his bed, changing into some brown elastic shorts and a loose black t-shirt.

She slung a yellow cardigan over her shirt, quickly brushing her hair back, before placing a pikachu headband on her hair.

With a tight breath echoing her chest, she sprinted back down.

Brock perked up as Pikachu cheered.

"Miho!" Brock grinned handing her the torch. "Feel better?"

"Much." She admitted, before looking at the president. "I'm ready to run."

"Ash?" The president blinked catching her grimace.

"It's me, with all due respect sir." She smiled uneasily. "On days like today, I prefer Miho. It's the name my mother chose for me."

He grinned and nodded, opening the door with an exaggerated wave.

"This Parade belongs to the people who should no longer be hated nor hidden." he glanced out the door. "Run for all of us Miho."

She grinned, a warm bubbly feeling rising in her chest as she was ready to jog out with the torch raised high.

Pikachu hastily clung onto her shoulder messily adding something cold onto both her cheeks. They jumped off, a proud mix of yellow, white, purple and black painted onto their tail.

The non-Binary flag. She recognized that easily, it was one that James had shown her.

A mix of pink, white, purple, black and blue were spread evenly on their claws.

"Genderfluid colors on your face." Brock patted her arm, the colors of both Pikachu and her flag on his face as well. "Let's go!"

Feeling the swell of pride bloom in her chest, she held her head high.

Sprinting out she got many looks, looks of astonishment and amazement, looks of disgust and confusion.

She ignored half the looks, holding the flame high.

Upon running, many began to run and walk behind her. Cheering her on as waves of flags were held high. Colors of the rainbow fluttered alongside her, people she was afraid of being pushed back and blocked before her very eyes.

With a smile she let out a whoop of delight, Pikachu mimicking her call with one of their own.

Behind her, thousands of people followed her example.

It was time for a change.

And fear would no longer be apart of it.

**Hey, everyone! back with a chapter two. **

**Thank you all for reading it and i hope you enjoyed this as well :D**

**Maiden out. **


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